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February 28, 2001 (Wednesday)
Well, no news is good news, and so I have nothing of much interest to report about the rogue plate, Le General. As always, the struggle goes on, neither side gaining ground. Unable to recruit any new rebels, the rogue plate had to content itself with raising the flag of rebellion alone. Like two competing chess masters, we have come to possess a mutual admiration for each other. I have come to respect the steadfastness with which he clings to his principles. It is more than abundantly clear that he will not choose to wash himself. Though he is an evil plate, the consistency of his philosophy must be admired. As a renaissance man well schooled in philosophy, I must readily conceed that.
As an aside of no import, Deirdre did not have dinner in the apartment last night.
This short respite from my chosen crusade has allowed me to take some liberties with the photograph of Le General. I believe I have captured his essence in this photograph, as the reader can readily attest. I am quite sure the reader will not take offense at the liberty I have taken with the angle of this shot. Yes, you've guessed correctly, oh perceptive reader, it is indeed an homage to those wonderfully scripted Batman television shows of the 60's. I can modestly say that this shot screams out Wham Pow, as befits Le General.
In an unrelated matter, it appears as if three glasses have disappeared from our collection. I fear these three glasses have been victims of foul play. Only one very frightened glass remains. I have taken a photograph of this remaining glass for your consideration. If you see these glasses, please tell them to come home right away. Tell them that mother Deirdre misses them dearly.
As an advance payment to the helpful reader and Deirdre fan, I have also included a picture of Deirdre's personal ash tray along with the remaining glass.
"Dude, you guys got robbed. When you guys got Deirdre as a roommate, you didn't just get regular Deirdre. You guys got Klepto-Deirdre. If you look in her room, I'm sure you'll find your missing glasses." Ok, man, be careful what you say next. You're already on thin ice with me. Don't you be besmirching our fair lass.
"Ok, but I've got a question for you. Maybe the reason why no new plates showed up was because Deirdre didn't use any last night? I mean, you guys wash your dishes when you're finished. It's only Deirdre who doesn't wash her dishes." Ok, that's the last straw. I have had it up to here with you and your mouthing off. I apologize to the reader, as I will have to cut this session short by proceeding to give this heathen the thrashing of his life. Until next time, gentle reader, I bid you a good night.